Another Long Week Ahead!
Updated: Aug 23
Monday morning - new day, new week! Let today be filled with nothing but positivity. No wine until Friday, no more eating crap and let this week be productive! It occurs to me that no amount of walking, endless hours of trampoling or football will make my kids tired....my kids DO NOT tire!!! So....I booked a family swim session for me and the kids at the baths. Feeling content that I had organised a cheap & healthy activity AND that I still had my free car park pass as part of my gym membership, we clambered into the car.
As I pulled onto the empty car park a sudden feeling of confusion hit me when I was met by three men in full PPE! As I put my window down I was greeted with orders of
"No, put your window up....DO NOT...I repeat DO NOT get out of your car!!"
After some bewilderment (on my part) and my full efforts to attempt lip reading I discovered that my 'free car park' had now been turned into a Mobile Covid Testing Unit.
My face resembling a red beacon, I offered my apologies and proceeded to the next car park. The next 20 minutes consisted of me putting £2 in the meter and persuading the kids to "Please get out of the car" and reassuring them that just because Mummy had accidentally driven through a Mobile Covid Testing Unit it DID NOT mean that they had now contracted Covid 19!!!!
Reluctantly, they sauntered behind me into the swimming baths, ignoring their pleas of
"No Mum...please no more hand sanitizer" we sanitised and got changed. Biggest Boy Child "Mum can I wear my Everton top in the pool?" Me "No, don't be stupid" Biggest Boy Child "But you make me wear a top in the pool on holiday....I want to wear my top" Me "That's in 30 degree hot sun, take your bloody top off" After 50 minutes of being splashed left, right and centre and endless echoes of "Muuuum look at me" "Muuuum I'm dunking him"....."Muuuum I need a wee".... we get out and proceed to the changing rooms! Despite packing 5 towels between 4 of us, I'm still left towel-less as it seems Girl Child 'needs' at least 2 towels to be deemed fully dry. I use one of the saturated used towels to dry myself whilst all three happily blast the hairdryer in each others faces.
Feeling drained I agree to buying tea (at least I can take full advantage of the 'Eat Out to Help Out Scheme????)...but no, I'm clearly not as organised as half of Wigan and every frigging restaurant and cafe is booked. Alas....fast food, Biggest Boy Child wants Maccies, Girl Child wants Subway and Little Boy Child wants a Greggs!!! My disposable mask is p@@s wet through because it's been shoved in the same bag as the swimming costumes, I can't enter Subway AND I can't split myself in three and be in ALL three queues at the same time.....so we head home! Three hours later....I've cooked Three different teas in what can only be described as a sauna of a kitchen and the kids have wacked the tennis ball over next doors garden....for the 416th time!
I'm still sat with chlorine infused hair, I've consumed a family size Cadburys Fruit and Nut and opened another bottle of Tesco's own Merlot....I think I should have invested in shares of Tesco Merlot prior to lockdown, missed a trick with that one! What will the rest of the week bring?